TUESDAY POETRY CHALLENGE - Week of 02/24/09

Want to write a poem but can't think of a new idea? Here's the place for inspiration.

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mslover
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TUESDAY POETRY CHALLENGE - Week of 02/24/09

Postby mslover » Tue Feb 24, 2009 11:49 pm

:D after this challenge the baton for the challenges gets passed to Mlou for the month of march. keep 'em coming...

1. Coffee shops... anything to do with them. the smell, the ambiance, the people that hang out there in your favorite.....

2. Write a poem speaking from the point of view of an object or an animal.

3. Take a familiar light verse (nursery rhyme, limerick, etc) and turn it into a "serious" poem, formal or not. Example - take the Humpty Dumpty and turn it into something more.

Good luck!

"Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories - we've already missed the spring"

"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning how to dance in the rain."
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PaulG
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Postby PaulG » Wed Feb 25, 2009 10:42 am

Hey Mslover, give poor Humpty Dumpty a break! Anything more to him would be piling on. :-D

Is this the type of thing you were aiming for in #3?

There was a young lass from Nantucket
With a knife in her back where he’d stuck it.
The cops came and got him
And took him to Gotham.
Where his case is next on the docket!
...and every now & then I spend my time at rhyme & verse & curse those faults in me...- "Along Comes Mary"- The Association

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Postby pengwenn » Wed Feb 25, 2009 1:25 pm

PaulG I actually laughed out loud when I read that. That was funny! I loved it! My co-workers might think I've lost it but hopefully most of them are already at lunch.
Is this my reality or yours?
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Postby PaulG » Wed Feb 25, 2009 2:31 pm

Pengwenn,
Thanks. My goal was a smile and got a laugh. I'm ahead of plan. :)
...and every now & then I spend my time at rhyme & verse & curse those faults in me...- "Along Comes Mary"- The Association

"I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done."- Steven Wright
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Postby Mlou » Wed Feb 25, 2009 3:40 pm

I agree. But pw, did you mean "at lunch" or actually "out to lunch"...no clue? :)
nothing is ever simply Yes or No. There's always a But...


GINGERBREAD MAN by Mary Lou Healy at Amazon.com http://www.publishamerica.com/shopping/ ... ogid=16658 at Publish America
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Postby pengwenn » Wed Feb 25, 2009 5:10 pm

With the day I've been having I don't know what I mean. :(
Is this my reality or yours?
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Postby Mlou » Wed Feb 25, 2009 5:32 pm

Pengwenn...Not that this has ANYTHING to do with this thread :roll: but I must say I like your avatar. Did you know I used to write a lot of the Peanuts cards for Hallmark?
nothing is ever simply Yes or No. There's always a But...





GINGERBREAD MAN by Mary Lou Healy at Amazon.com http://www.publishamerica.com/shopping/ ... ogid=16658 at Publish America
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Postby mslover » Thu Feb 26, 2009 4:14 pm

PaulG wrote:Is this the type of thing you were aiming for in #3?


Not quite what I was thinking but I like it! :) Limericks are always a fun one as a challenge. I was thinking more along the lines of taking it and making it into something more somber without the cutesy rhyme scheme.

however, that said, that's the cool thing about the challenges. they are there to give you ideas and then you get to take your own direction and go with it.

let's see more!!! :D

"Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories - we've already missed the spring"

"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning how to dance in the rain."
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Postby mae » Fri Feb 27, 2009 10:24 pm

#3
Old children's saying"

Sticks and stones may break my bones
but words will never hurt me.

mae's version

Sticks and stones may break my bones
but words will break my heart.
My heart beats in poetry. I think in rhythm and dream in rhyme.

Give me a crit! I can take it!

CELTIC QUEEN, an Epic Poem, Cynthia M. Bateman, amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com, http://www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore ... +Epic+Poem at Tate Publishing
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Postby mae » Fri Feb 27, 2009 10:59 pm

#1

Beginning Coffeehouse

Latte, gran-day
Mocha breve,
foamless, crema
short, tall, skinny, wet.



My Spanish is no good in here,
nor my high school French as well.
My German friends are lost in here,
I'm not sure what country's clientele

can speak the language heard in here.
It seems a strange dialect.
They should issue dictionaries here
for those with limited intellect!

I don't know what I've ordered here
so it's always a surprise
when I've bought a drink I like in here
and walk out fully energized.

The jargon that is heard in here,
the lingo that is spoken
just goes to show that at least in here
the language bar is still not broken!

mae
My heart beats in poetry. I think in rhythm and dream in rhyme.



Give me a crit! I can take it!



CELTIC QUEEN, an Epic Poem, Cynthia M. Bateman, amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com, http://www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore ... +Epic+Poem at Tate Publishing
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Postby Saphyre » Sat Feb 28, 2009 2:01 am

Mae- I love them both, but the second one more. I feel the same way when I go to starbucks, I always have to have my friends interpret the menu for me. And I have the added barrier of not liking coffee but not wanting to stand out as the only one without a hot drink on the cold mornings... so I end up getting some odd tea or something. As you said, it's always a surprize to see what they give me for my order!

One comment, the rythm seemed off to me, what it supposed to be consistant or break up to give the reader a disjointed feel to match the rest of the setting? I kind of like the way it makes us feel the speaker's confusion and alienation, but I don't know if that's what you were aiming for...
~Saphyre
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus…
For by grace you have been saved through faith… it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.
Please always feel free to critique anything I write as I am by no means perfect!
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Postby Mlou » Sat Feb 28, 2009 10:47 am

#3
Jack jumped over the candlestick
And his pantaloons caught fire.
He should have heeded sage advice
And jumped a smidgeon higher!
nothing is ever simply Yes or No. There's always a But...





GINGERBREAD MAN by Mary Lou Healy at Amazon.com http://www.publishamerica.com/shopping/ ... ogid=16658 at Publish America
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Mlou
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Postby Mlou » Sat Feb 28, 2009 11:04 am

#1
CONUNDRUM
I never drink coffee.
Tea is my bag.
And I can't understand
How spirits will sag
Among devotees
Of this fragrant bean
If denied daily fix
That they need to be keen.
Yet the flavor I favor
In ice cream, by the by,
Is that of strong coffee
But don't ask me why!
nothing is ever simply Yes or No. There's always a But...





GINGERBREAD MAN by Mary Lou Healy at Amazon.com http://www.publishamerica.com/shopping/ ... ogid=16658 at Publish America
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Postby JillStar » Sat Feb 28, 2009 12:36 pm

Mlou... very nice. I'm not a coffe fan (1 cup maybe a month) and drink much more tea. But I also love coffe icecreams!!

I really like the way your poem flows.
Fast Fiction Friday Blog 2011-2018: Additional FFF Prompts
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Postby Mlou » Sun Mar 01, 2009 11:31 am

Hah! For some very odd reason, the only time I ever have a cup of coffee, well-laced with cream and sugar, is with the delicious baked beans I cook from scratch.
nothing is ever simply Yes or No. There's always a But...





GINGERBREAD MAN by Mary Lou Healy at Amazon.com http://www.publishamerica.com/shopping/ ... ogid=16658 at Publish America
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mae
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Postby mae » Sun Mar 01, 2009 4:10 pm

Okay, Saphyre, is this better?

Beginning Coffeehouse 101

Latte, gran-day
Mocha breve,
foamless, crema
short, tall, skinny, wet.



My Spanish is no good in here,
nor my high school French as well.
My German friends are lost in here,
I'm not sure what clientele

can speak the language heard in here.
It's a strange dialect.
They need dictionaries here
for limited intellects!

I don't know what I've ordered here
so it's always a surprise
when I've bought a drink I like in here
and walk out energized.

The jargon that is heard in here,
the lingo that is spoken
just shows you that at least in here
the language bar's been broken.


mae
My heart beats in poetry. I think in rhythm and dream in rhyme.



Give me a crit! I can take it!



CELTIC QUEEN, an Epic Poem, Cynthia M. Bateman, amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com, http://www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore ... +Epic+Poem at Tate Publishing
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Saphyre
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Postby Saphyre » Sun Mar 01, 2009 11:11 pm

stanzas 1, 4, and 5 are perfect. line 4 of 2 seems forced, and the third stanza is off, but I like it. It gives it personality. And i'm sure if someone else read it it would sound fine to them. This is just my opinion.
~Saphyre

For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus…

For by grace you have been saved through faith… it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.

Please always feel free to critique anything I write as I am by no means perfect!

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