Choices: Thoughts on Love----please crit

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J. Smith
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Choices: Thoughts on Love----please crit

Postby J. Smith » Thu Aug 07, 2008 1:14 am

A poem which I have been working on for a couple of days. I'm not exactly sure if I'm finished, but for now I am. Please comment, critique, and discuss! I would love to hear your thoughts on either the poem itself, or your personal opinions on the subject matter.


Choices


What is love?
What is love, but a choice?
A choice between yes or no.

This destiny or that,
Does it matter?

Does love find us? Or are our roles reversed?
An instinct? Or a decision?
Are we a servant to love? Or it’s master?

Love: the connection of the soul
or
Love: the acceptance of the mind

Does cupid run wild, shooting arrows of love?
Or is he locked in a cage, set free when we choose?

What is love?
What is love, but a guess?
After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. Aldous Huxley


It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets, 1999
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Mlou
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Postby Mlou » Thu Aug 07, 2008 6:05 pm

Well, you can probably see where I chime in, if you read my own tag line. :-D This poem seems more a list of questions, rather than any conclusions at which you have arrived.
No, I don't think love is a guess. It's a deeply felt emotion that you are powerless to resist...if it is indeed love, and not just infatuation. Moreover, the totality of love is not merely romantic feelings, cupid and all that, but love of family and of friends as well.
nothing is ever simply Yes or No. There's always a But...


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J. Smith
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Postby J. Smith » Fri Aug 08, 2008 12:59 am

First off, I did write this poem as more of an open-ended question than a conclusion on what love truly is. My goal was not to press my own opinion on the reader, but to make them question their own thoughts.

Alright, now this is the 6th time I have rewritten this post. I've been at it for almost an hour and a half, trying to put into words what I think love is. And after writing and rewriting lengthy descriptions of love, I have erased it all and decided on one simple fact:

I don't know. And I don't believe that anyone else does either. It is far too complex for anybody to understand it to it's full extent. However, I believe it is much more than just a destiny which we are incapable of affecting. I believe, at the very least, we have one choice. We can accept love, or we can reject it. And I agree entirely with one thing, Mlou. Love is much more than romantics and infatuation. It is a connection on a deep level. It is when two souls bond together, whether it is friends, family, or a life partner. Well, that's about all I will say on the subject, because saying that I know anything more would be foolish, naive, and a blatant lie.
After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. Aldous Huxley





It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.

J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets, 1999
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Mlou
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Postby Mlou » Fri Aug 08, 2008 8:59 am

There are probably as many "definitions" of love as there are kinds of love. We can safely say that love is one of the great mysteries and also one of the great gifts of life. :)
nothing is ever simply Yes or No. There's always a But...





GINGERBREAD MAN by Mary Lou Healy at Amazon.com http://www.publishamerica.com/shopping/ ... ogid=16658 at Publish America
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Postby fiona » Fri Aug 08, 2008 11:14 am

I would define love as a healthy energy, with no regard of any classification whatsoever (is “whatsoever” correctly used here?).
I would go as far as to saying that you can feel love for things. For instance, I’m trying to learn how to love writing and some little flowers and plants I’m growing. Don’t laugh at me! It does sound cheesy but It’s true!
The other kinds of love –love for people- I’ve felt all. That’s why I’m trying to develop a love feeling I haven’t felt before. Exploring love is an adventure in itself.
Again, for me love is always healthy, I don’t believe it can become unhealthy, since if this happens, then love is replaced by a different feeling which thus proved to be more powerful than it.
As living creatures, we seek love to feel fully connected to life. Even evil creatures are love seekers.

Nice to meet you, J! :-P
Know me by what I did today.
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Postby mae » Fri Aug 08, 2008 1:55 pm

In my opinion, LOVE is a verb. It is an action first of all, before it becomes a noun. You can behave in a loving manner to people in general or a specific person and soon find that an emotion akin to the action has come to take the place of indifference in your heart. Likewise, if you treat someone you have cared for with indifference or hostility, then those feelings will, before long take over.

It is definitely a noun, but not at first. Just as you can say that a sunflower seed is a 9 feet tall flower full of birdseed - and be correct - you can also say that the initial attraction you feel upon meeting someone is love. It is not yet, but it very well may be, if it's cultivated properly.

Looking at it this way, I agree with J. that love is a choice, but not of accepting or rejecting; more, I think, of behaviors - loving or indifferent.

I agree with Fiona that love is always healthy and if it isn't, then love is replaced by something else.

So there's my 2 bits' worth. mae 8)
My heart beats in poetry. I think in rhythm and dream in rhyme.

Give me a crit! I can take it!

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J. Smith
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Postby J. Smith » Fri Aug 08, 2008 2:49 pm

Well said, Mae!
After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. Aldous Huxley





It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.

J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets, 1999
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mae
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Postby mae » Fri Aug 08, 2008 4:03 pm

Thank you, J. Smith

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets, 1999


I love your signature line. I always told my children (now all grown), when they became offended over something a friend said or did, that being offended is a choice. If you know that wasn't the intent, then choose not to be offended. And even if you suspect it was the intent, you can still choose not to be offended and show a bit of wisdom and grace, and perhaps win over your friend.

Most of life and nearly all of our reactions are choices. Too often, people abandon reason and let emotion take over. Not that emotion is a bad thing, mind you, but it should not rule your actions.

mae
My heart beats in poetry. I think in rhythm and dream in rhyme.



Give me a crit! I can take it!



CELTIC QUEEN, an Epic Poem, Cynthia M. Bateman, amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com, http://www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore ... +Epic+Poem at Tate Publishing
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Postby Saphyre » Fri Aug 08, 2008 6:38 pm

At a recent purity conference we beat this up a lot, and came to these conclusions:

First, love is overused in English (ex: I love ice-cream. I love my cat. I made love to my husband...) but what we're talking about in this thread is stronger than the first two and obviously not the second.

So, we come to the second conclusion: love can be instantaneous, just like dislike. Sometimes you meet someone and just hit it off or are immediately rubbed the wrong way. But that love, if not cultivated, is nothing (like what Mae said about the seed) so that's not what we're really talking about here.
The third: love, true love that will last whether between a family, friend, or future spouse, is a response-not a reaction! As said above, it is deliberate. It is a choice.

Fourth: emotions are fickle- as knows any girl that finds herself crying without a good reason and with no ability to stop. Reason on the other hand can be controlled, and resolutions can be held to even through volatile emotions. Therefore, only the shallowest of love can be based on emotion. So...

Love is a deliberate response and a resolution.
~Saphyre
For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus…
For by grace you have been saved through faith… it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.
Please always feel free to critique anything I write as I am by no means perfect!
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Postby mslover » Mon Aug 11, 2008 1:20 pm

Saphyre wrote:Love is a deliberate response and a resolution.


I really, really like this statement - and believe it. and i very much enjoyed reading everyone's take on it. perhaps i will find some time to investigate my thoughts more on it later but i was taken with the conversation and couldn't help but at least making note of it.

"Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories - we've already missed the spring"

"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning how to dance in the rain."
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mae
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Postby mae » Mon Aug 11, 2008 2:08 pm

The third: love, true love that will last whether between a family, friend, or future spouse, is a response-not a reaction! As said above, it is deliberate. It is a choice


Saphyre, I looked up the definition of 'reaction' and it has a variety of definitions - one of which is a response. In my opinion, human reactions do not have to be immediate or "knee-jerk". They often are, but they don't have to be. We can choose how we react to any given stimulus or event. I think what you are saying is practically the same as what I said, just using different words. Love is a verb - a choice we make on how to act and react (or respond).

I don't believe that "love" is instantaneous, like dislike. I believe attraction can be, either on a physical or emotional level, but not love. Do I believe in love at first sight? As a practical matter, no. I believe you can be strongly attracted to someone at the outset and it can grow very quickly into love - like the sunflower seed - but not immediately.

Well, now I'm up to four bits! mae
My heart beats in poetry. I think in rhythm and dream in rhyme.



Give me a crit! I can take it!



CELTIC QUEEN, an Epic Poem, Cynthia M. Bateman, amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com, http://www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore ... +Epic+Poem at Tate Publishing

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