New meat...Crit please

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Jesse B. Simple

New meat...Crit please

Postby Jesse B. Simple » Fri Feb 20, 2004 3:05 am

This is new to me, but I look forward to hearing any and all thoughts.

my prophet

please don’t kill my prophet
there’s so much I want to hear
you cannot control me
by dispensing worry and fear

I believe what I choose
not everything i’m told
don’t disrespect me
just because you’re old

I may be young
with a lot yet to learn
I respect everyone
i’ll get my turn

collecting my thoughts
taking everything in
so look out
one day i’ll win

then my prophet
can shout from the hills
we are all individuals
with indiviudal skills

it takes all of us
not just one
so please don’t kill my prophet
at least let him run

by Jesse B. Simple
Last edited by Jesse B. Simple on Fri Feb 20, 2004 11:55 am, edited 1 time in total.
BobbyB

Postby BobbyB » Fri Feb 20, 2004 9:26 am

First of all, congratulations for jumping right in. I had to run around a bit first and that was just to get the nerve to introduce myself. I still haven't posted any of my writing yet.

I suspect I am way older than you, and if this is you narrating this poem--I respect you.

Welcome!
Jesse B. Simple

Postby Jesse B. Simple » Fri Feb 20, 2004 11:59 am

Thanks for the kind words. I have been writing for a long time and thought why not share it with the world. I would love some thoughts on the writing though as well.


Age is one of two things, either a number or a state of mind, nothing more, nothing less. I believe that everyone has something to offer and age should not be a factor. The one exception of course is the amount of information a well aged mind has burried deep in the folds.

I know that writing is very personal, but why would you be afraid to post things here? It seems like a friendly place.
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Bess
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Postby Bess » Fri Feb 20, 2004 12:38 pm

I too jumped right in because this site seemed very friendly, a safe place to grow.

Your work touched me. I've been there.
BobbyB

Postby BobbyB » Fri Feb 20, 2004 12:59 pm

Jesse--I like talking to people in person--this whole computer thing has been new to me. I've warmed up to it though. You are right, not a friendlier place to be found.

I'm not really a poet or a poetry reader, but I am wondering: is your prophet, the inner beliefs you have as to what the future will bring?
Jesse B. Simple

Postby Jesse B. Simple » Fri Feb 20, 2004 3:08 pm

I hear you about talking in person. The computer has many uses, but it worries me that people are treating their computers like friends.

I never posted a thing before I posted this first poem. I guess I just wanted to see what people were going to say.

It's funny...I would say that you hit the nail on the head to some degree about what the poem is about, but I also believe that poetry should stand on it's own and that there should be no set meaning. Each person will see a little something different in everything, not just writing.

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