I start training tomorrow! I'm excited for that. Plus I got to see sexy Susan all day, so even more fun for me.
But a moment of venting...
Never live with anyone you're not sleeping with. I thought I had sort of gotten past this rule of mine, because technically Debbie and I HAVE slept together. But as its not a continuous thing (it actually never happened again, despite her occasional interest), I think that must be the drawback.
As I believe I have already alluded to, the months since February have not been particularly kind. I quit my job, and THAT drama was just... bad. And right after Debbie was hospitalized because she had gone on so many "dates" (an average of 2-3 a day/night) that she had exhausted herself to the point of hallucination, and was falling all over the place. And because she was manic, she was being a right little brat too. The night before she was hospitalized I caught her getting involved in some really dangerous stuff, stuff that sooner or later could hurt me too. That was when I had to abandon all "tolerance" of her choices and call her therapist to let him know she'd hit the deep end. Some of this dangerous stuff is STILL spilling over into our lives, as one "date" is clearly dangerous and sending her threatening texts and calling every day despite her telling him (at my request) to leave her alone.
Then Jamie and I break up again, and later I discover she's locked up, and all the while I've been trying to tackle three jobs so that I can pay the bills. Unfortunately that meant I had to use her vehicle, which I COMPLETELY understand sucks big time, but when it comes to the choice of paying rent and having a home, or losing a little time going on "dates", I assumed it was a no-brainer.
I get the inconvenience, and well, I actually get all of her perspective. I guess what I don't get is that after all I've done and put up with from HER, including saving her butt in the first place by wrangling it so that she could move in here and pay about $200 less than she was and going totally broke, she couldn't be more understanding about it. If I were sitting on my ass all day, I'd totally understand. But THREE JOBS. THREE! Did she think I was having fun? That I was out carousing with the girls?
So we're about a week late on a couple bills. We called, its fine, payment plan yadayadayada. But obviously she was freaked out because we couldn't pay everything in full this month. Princess wanted me to magically get more money somehow. So we could keep the Comcast!
And my reply was, Comcast is not a necessity. I know its been awhile since you had your asshole boyfriend build you a house and fund your every expenditure - including her Jeep, eating out, and all her bills - but this is REAL life now, and in REAL LIFE, WE ARE POOR. We don't get to always have cable and internet at our fingertips and "dates" in New Hampshire in the middle of the night in a hotel just BECAUSE. Sometimes we have to lose that stuff, and personally, I have lived places where we had to shut off the gas too. That's life. Kinda have to accept it and move on.
I certainly don't expect her to LIKE it, but her spoiled brat attitude is just pissing me off and making me feel like she's being a little ungrateful. We can't pay the bills, you're blaming me, but you work 2 hrs a week or something, just bought a gym membership, and *I'm* to blame??? How about if she's so worried, she stop playing around all the time, hell bent on her expensive Atkin's diet/gym membership fitness goals and lose some weight going to WORK?
Am I being unreasonable? I kinda don't think so. Though admittedly, I am crabby and tired and have little patience to suffer fools, and I never noticed it when things were peachy keen, but now that they're not, I'm realizing... she's actually kind of stupid. Or ditzy. And boy crazy. Like a teenager.
I think I liked her better when she was depressed. I mean, I worried, but at least she was a little more grounded.
Oh, well. Just had to get that out. I'm kinda stuck with her now, and I'm not going to kick her out or anything, because that's just rancid, unless there was some kind of danger or totally out of control behavior.
Scratch that. I guess that already happened, huh?
You're WELCOME Debbie! Thanks for being so supportive when for once *I* needed YOU!
Jesus. I need to sleep. I get my car back tonight or tomorrow, so the end of needing her Jeep for work. I train for the driver job tomorrow, and sexy Susan is gorgeous and smiled at me all day when she was hanging around. Life can't be that bad, right?
<i>It may help to understand human affairs to be clear that most of the great triumphs and tragedies of history are caused, not by people being fundamentally good or fundamentally bad, but by people being fundamentally people. - Terry Pratchett</i>